thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
