i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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