she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
