is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
