Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
