He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
why is half of my head shaved?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
