Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
