Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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