I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
