Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize