i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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