just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
