guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Randomize