its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
