I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
