She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
