And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
