i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize