I think im going to throw up on grandma
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
