Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
We left an ass print on the piano.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
