So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
