thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
