I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
We are all done wearing pants today
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
