i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
