He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
where does the pee come out of this thing
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
