how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
