How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
