I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
