i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
if i died would you start the facebook group?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Randomize
