You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Duck Duck Cougar?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
