I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
