yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
