Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
