connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
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