found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
