im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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