at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
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