I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
