she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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