omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
