yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I don't deserve a penis
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
You ruined the universe
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
