is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
