I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
