so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize