I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize