we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
