she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
