Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Are we still banned from the library?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
