Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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