you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
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