I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
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