These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
